Act Classy Cares iPhone 4

Published on September 10th, 2012 | by kdiddy

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Advice For Gene Francesconi, Elizabeth Township’s Chairman Of Lewd Texts

iPhone 4I tend to avoid the local news. House fires and car accidents, while certainly very sad and tragic, aren’t really “news,” per se. They’re just shitty things that happen to people sometimes. “News,” in my opinion, is information about events that affect all of us. An environmental disaster, a piece of legislation…that kind of thing. But that stuff doesn’t pull in ratings so you tend not to hear too much about it.

Every once in awhile, a local news story will pop up that is still more or less pointless and adds nothing to my life, but is just too entertaining to ignore. Last week, the story of Gene Francesconi, the Chairman of the Board of Commissioners in Elizabeth Township, PA, grabbed my attention.

Francesconi was accused of sending vulgar text messages to another township employee with his personal cell phone. Unfortunately, these texts weren’t relatively harmless, like, “ELIZABETH MOTHERFUCKING TOWNSHIP, SON! WHAT?” The texts revealed that Francesconi was kind of a racist dickhead. One was allegedly a picture of a pregnant black woman with the text, “Housewives of Section 8 — all new season starts Thursdays at 2 a.m. on BET.” Another said, “The 10th annual (expletive) tournament is tomorrow! We ask that you please do not attend so a ‘girl’ can win this year. Thanks champ!” I’m guessing the expletive was bitch? I don’t know.

Francesconi has since apologized for the text messages, but neither he nor the Board of Commissioners has had much else to say about the matter, even though some residents want the Chairman to resign. I’m willing to bet that any time the subject of Francesconi or the Board addressing the scandal comes up, increasingly ignorant things come out of dude’s face since he obviously isn’t high on class. I’m also willing to bet that Francesconi is fuming somewhere along the lines of, “I really don’t see what’s so wrong with what I said.”

Gene, allow me to explain.

  1. It’s really just not okay to say/think/feel that way. People, for various reasons, fall into the lower classes of society and we’ve generally agreed that it’s not okay to let broke people die on the streets. (Not that it doesn’t still happen.) And attaching the remark to an image of a black woman perpetuates a really nasty stereotype snickered about by lots of not-broke white people who generally don’t know what that kind of life is like. So, shut the hell up. Granted, Elizabeth Township is like 99% white (shocking) so his direct constituents probably don’t care.
  2. However, I’m aware that clueless jerks like you will always be around, but please listen to me when I say that you should never ever document these feelings anywhere and then expect your political career to be unscathed.
  3. Gene. Honey. You are really in no position to talk any kind of shit when you sport a mug like this:

Gene Francesconi

I mean, seriously, dude. You’re beautiful in the way that all of us are beautiful, but surely you’ve noticed that you have what appears to be a fence in your mouth? Please don’t make me commission you to build a dam.

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About the Author

kdiddy is a lifelong Pittsburgher and always has trouble readings people’s facial expressions when she tells them that. She’s been a writer since somewhere around second grade, when she penned a novella about a monster who attacked her suburb, devoured all of the kids in her Catholic school, and put a hurt on the supply of hot dogs in the cafeteria. Since that auspicious beginning, she’s earned a few fancy-pants writing degrees and vomited her words in print and online (kdiddy.org, MamaPop.com). Her hobbies include wife-ing, mothering, showing hoes no love, carbs, and candy.



  • Razzamatazz

    To borrow a tag line from the beef industry: “Stupid… It’s what for dinner.”

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