New Devo Song Slams Mitt Romney For Roof-Racking His Dog
*sings* If a Mitt runs out of room, HEWILLROOFYOU!
Strap you to a speeding tomb. MITTWILLROOFYOU!
If you’re Mitt Romney’s dog, (MITTWILLROOFYOU)
Call PETA, they’re agog (MITTWILLROOFYOU)!
I say roof it. Roof it good.
Thanks a heap for not returning my call, Devo. My lyrics are epic. I’ve got rhymes for effing days. But, I suppose, your ode to GOP Presidential nearly-nominee Mitt Romney’s late dog Seamus will have to do.
Not Seamus Romney but a likely sympathizer.
“Don’t Roof Rack Me, Bro (Seamus Unleashed)” is the latest single from new wave band Devo. Devo last cracked the Billboard Charts with 1980’s “Whip It.”
Which is different from cracking after doing some whip-its.
“Don’t Roof Rack Me, Bro” tells the tale of Romney strapping his Irish Setter’s travel crate to the roof of the family car for a 12-hour drive. Be clear: the travel crate was not sans doggie. It was totally avec doggie. The tale of Seamus and the roof-rack is one Romney, himself, told in 2007. It is a tale that ends in Romney discussing a bout of dog diarrhea. All captured by the Boston Globe, baby.
Diarrhea stories done killed it.
And somehow THIS is the first time someone has written a song about it?
Gerry Casale of Devo says he’s not thrilled with President Obama’s first term, citing his failure to close Guantanamo as a chief complaint.
Y’know, if you don’t like [blindly following the leader in] America, Devo, you can take your whimsical hats and scoot on out.
But Casale says he will still vote for the President, whom Devo supported with a fundraising show in 2008. Enjoying some blowback for something other than not being Devo’s Mark Mothersbaugh (a successful composer and Yo Gabba Gabba guest) or failing to play “the good stuff” at the state fair, Casale had this to say about the response to the single:
“Even though our political candidate choices are about as deep as the difference between Pepsi and Coke these days, and knowing that the president is just a figurehead bought and paid for by the Plutocracy that is America in Century 21, character still matters. A president should take the same oath as doctors, i.e., “Do No Harm.” We make pets dependent on us. We created all the dog breeds. We are thus responsible as stewards over all species. Case closed.”
I say, “Good for Other Guy In Devo!” You wanna run the free world, deal with the inevitable Devo song parody comin’ your way. But why stop with Devo: where are all your other 80s favorites, capturing the magic of the 2012 Presidential race with some new righteous tunes? I, for one, can’t wait to see if Devo has started a trend. Can we look forward to:
- …Flock of Seagulls’ “And Ayn Rand” in honor of Robbie in Dirty Dancing and any other creep show who thinks shoving a copy of The Fountainhead in your pocket makes you seem deep.
I now have proof that the internet can read my mind.
- …Depeche Mode pointing its moody finder squarely at any Paul Ryan fans who support atheists being unable to hold office in several U.S. states. *cue techno beat* “Ayn Rand…didn’t…like…Jesus. Didn’t think he was there, just didn’t care.”
- …Glass Tiger putting pen to parchment for “Don’t you un-insure my mom.”
My heart would break. (Photo by: UP/Brian Kersey)
Not that I want pop music icons of days gone by to let the sitting president off the hook either. What do you say, Wham! – would you consider reuniting to ask POTUS to wake me up when he closes Guantanamo? Now THAT would put the boom-boom into my heart.
About the Author
Molly Martin Professor Darla Von Classypants is actually Molly G. Martin. Because Ann Landers and Dear Abby and Dear Prudence haven't used real names in 67 years so why should she? And if you're thinking this reminds you of an old Dave Barry schtick: when you grow up and get your own blog, THEN you can have opinions.
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